Racing for a Cure. And for Her.
(Before you wonder where the usual popcorn-eating, novel-reading, awards show-absorbing Celeste is, fear not – she’s still here. Just tackling a bigger issue today. And I saw “The Hunger Games” and loved every minute of it.)
They’re probably two of the most frightening words a woman could hear – breast cancer. I’ve seen some of the strongest, most beautiful women in my life who faced this battle head on. Some were blessed to overcome and others ultimately lost the battle. And all of these women hold a special place in my heart because they each displayed the kind of poise, strength and determination than I don’t think I could ever possess.
My mom’s best friend, Jenny, had several bouts with breast cancer. And she beat it – so many times. But ultimately, the cancer had the last word, when Jenny passed away in 2008. She was a mother, grandmother, teacher, friend and so much more. She was a survivor.
My sister-in-law’s mother, Shelvy, battled breast cancer a few years ago. She’s quite possibly one of the happiest, kindest people I’ve ever met in my life. I remember thinking how unfair it is that the best people in this world are given some of the toughest tasks. But thankfully, she’s now cancer-free and going strong. She’s a survivor. Continue reading
Leave a commentMore Like Duck Duck Goose
My littlest sibling turned 21 this weekend–little being a reference to age and not size, as Eric is well over 6′ now. Geish! He used to be so tiny.
Since Dad remarried, I became the oldest sibling again. I’ve always had this idea that I’m supposed to lead the way so they’ll know what to expect when they get to the steps I’ve already passed. That’s not how this is going though.
Bryan, though it often doesn’t seem that way, is quite amazing. He has such an amazing personality. I am a difficult person to know–I can be crass, pointy edges and filterless. Bryan is one of those people that is great to be around. He’s charming without any feeling of coersion. When you’re on his company, he’s a calming presence. He doesn’t know what he wants to do yet with his life and I know it’s worrisome, but I know he’s going to work it out. If it’s true that life is easier for pretty people, then everything will have to work our for him because he’s the handsome one in the family–looks exactly like Dad did at 21. Continue reading
Leave a commentWhen Nothing’s Under Foot!
When I took my last step off the tower and my first into the windy air, my fear plunged into the crowd. I, on the other hand, was quite calm. Not a natural state for me. (I should thank my boss for getting the idea and the tickets.)
I didn’t think much about the reality of swinging on a wire high in the air over a crowd of people until we were a flight from the top of the tower –Wrapping the scaffolding was an excellent decision.
I’m actually not afraid of heights–a fear not common for short women–but many of the people at the top with me were. I didn’t spend much time thinking about it either. A woman on one end asked if someone wanted to go alone and I went for it. 
As I recall, decisions like these were what got me through dance auditions in high school. If you’re scared–go first. You won’t want to watch anyone else be scared. It’s contagious.
Swooping over the crowd with the overwhelming urge to reach my hands down to the crowd and hang upside down, smacking the hands raised as if it were possible. I wasn’t thinking enough to be worried. Maybe it’s this style of chucking caution that has gotten me this far.
My first interview out of college, I interviewed to be a lead editor for..not just a journal but a company that releases twelve journals.
Yeah, they didn’t call me back, but I’ve got that to remember.
At the time I really thought I would be a number one pick. Looking back, my resume must have looked pretty nifty because I didn’t have a single drop behind my ears for the position. Still don’t have much.
Hopefully if I keep my eyes up a little, I can avoid looking at myself and keep looking at the places I want to go and things I want to do.
Leave a commentFriendship
from cool-ten.com
I know I’ve mentioned before how difficult it is to make friends after college. Or rather, the setting has changed so much that I don’t even know how to go about it. So, I visited my college friends recently to find I’m not quite the same person I was.
My college friends knew me as a high-strung, often bitter person. I got nervous if we were running late for something as if my fate hung in the balance. Everything I did was a competition. I showered and dressed faster, I cleaned faster, I fought hard to be the smartest and usually in vain. The tension it takes to constantly try to be better than everyone is a waste.
My world is bigger now. I see hundreds of different people with hundreds of different backgrounds every day. If I looked at every day as a race, I would never make it to dinner.
It was interesting to look in the eyes of people who knew me as an entirely different person. The woman they remember and the woman I am today might not like each other if they met. Yet, the woman I am today is somewhat alone.
Social life in “the real world” still manages to illude me. I don’t know where to begin but I don’t want to back-peddle. I’ll really be alone if I start to compete with everyone all the time again.
I read books for clues to finding a job– maybe there’s books for clues to finding friends.
Watch My Feet
from cartoonstock.com
I’ve never been fond of the typical New Year’s revolution to eat better and get in shape. I have yet to see it truly work long-term for people who didn’t exercise before. So, dropping pounds, etc. was not my resolution. The time in my life when I was the most active (dancing, marching, jogging, etc.) was when I gained the most weight. My thyroid bottomed out and while my peers dropped weight instantly, I gained almost 50 lbs in less than a year. Since then, I’ve tried to tackle other problems first like laundry and class work.
Joining a gym and starting a fitness plan is a resolution of one of my friends. She called me up and, a few days later, we were dancing so hard I thought my heart would burst. The only thing keeping me from tripping over my own feet was watching the instructors feet, which fortunately were in bright white shape-ups– hard to miss. Continue reading
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